Y'all know what a big, humongous chicken I am. I mean I'm afraid to ride my own horse, who is afraid of squirrels and leaves and plastic bags.
The mall parking lot is full of kidnappers and serial killers.
People get sucked right out of airplanes (look it up, it's true, it happened on Hawaiian Airlines a few years ago to a flight attendant, but I don't recommend you hang around the emergency exit waiting for the bathroom.
You get the idea.
So it's probably appropriate that in Kauai, Hawaiian island of chickens (seriously, they all got loose after a hurricane in 1992 and roam the island roosting and crowing, unchecked) was a good place to go zip lining.
Incidentally, I happen to be afraid of chickens, too, after being viciously attacked by one when trying to shoo it out of our car's path. Never hurry along a chicken while you are in sandals.Just run it over instead- hey, it's you or the chicken, and a car gives you a little advantage over an angry chicken.1
Top 4 reasons to be fearful of zip lining 1) I really don't like heights. 2) I don't trust small wires to hold ever increasing me up over deep valleys. 3) I don't trust the judgement of barely past teenage guys, even if they have been to Afghanistan. 4) It's really way embarrassing to be way more afraid than a nine year old in public.
Still, I somehow did it- the hardest part was stepping off the platform- by the end I even zipped and jumped off into a lava tube pond and swam under its waterfall.
So now I can brag about it. Ridiculous, I know.
